I Became The Dickhead From My Apocalypse Novel
A Man With No Shame...
I am yun-Jiho
I write web novels in my spare time…
I am one of the best writers on the ”weeebnovels.com ” website, well known in the community and my chapters get high amounts of views.
But in real life i am just a lonely 36 years old male, that occupies a small room in a social residential building, the building consists of similar 3×3 m² rooms.
I am not good at socializing, at this age with no family, friends, or neighbors to chat with about the weather or some neighborhood rumors.
At work people sit at their computers and do stuff, i eagerly want to interrupt someone and start a conversation, but my self-awareness is very high to the extent that i can do just that, go to someone and start a conversation.
Days pass by like cars on a highway, except i am on a city bus with a top speed of 30km per hour, and other people in sports cars passing by, people my age had a wife and kids usually, but not me, a steady income is not everything.
Having breakfast from the convenience store is the first thing i do after leaving for work, at 6 AM i am on my way to the companys building, i enjoy fantasizing about the novel is writing, the morning air is a great cure for dry mind and lack of ideas.
Story-wise, i had no problem making scenes and tying them up together, but in doing so i made lots of loopholes in the side stories and lore, i always end up filling them with crap since no one cared about side characters lives.
Today i am excited, its the last chapter from the final scene, can wait to get back home and upload it.
I usually leave work at 7 PM and visit my favorite place, it is a restaurant where the food is great and the workers there are nice, and mainly one worker, shes beautiful and sweet i promised myself that today i will ask her out, i intended dropping writing and focus on my social skills more.
I know saying a 36-year-old dude could figure this out, but i never asked a girl out in my life, i crushed on her since the first day i visited this place 2 years ago. Shes used to me by now.
Ok, there she comes…
”Welcome Jiho-nim, you want the usual order ? ” Said the woman with a black apron.
”T-t thank you Hayoon-SSI, yes please the usual order. ”
”Okey coming right away. ” sais hayoon.
While she was turning back to leave, i gathered every bit of bravery and courage that was left of me, i am going to ask her out…
”Hayoon … A-are you .. i mean…i am interested in you… I mean you are beautiful and everything… What i want is… Are you free tomorrow lets go out and have a drink? ” Shouted me.
I mean yeah that was easier than i taught, but now she may not want to go out with me because of my stuttering.
”Ah sorry Jiho-nim but i can tomorrow is my husbands birthday, ” said hayoon.
Shit no … What i just did do!? is she… I should apologize.
”Ahh no problem hayoon-ssi, sorry that i asked so suddenly like this, forget about it ”
She finally turned and continued on her way. Waiting until this age to ask a girl out was a mistake, rejection is more devastating.
Am sure her husbands birthday is not tomorrow, its just a way to tell me to get away… I never asked her about anything ugh… I know nothing about her and yet i asked her out.
”Order is here, enjoy! ” Hayoon.
I enjoyed that meal, after all, food fixes everything, i should not forget to upload the last chapter today.
I arrived at my house which is just one room with a door and a clumsy bathroom, took a bath, and uploaded the last chapter before settling in my bed.
Hayoon-ssi was so nice to me, if she was someone else am sure the reaction could have been more aggressive, can blame her, i registered nothing about her although I was frequent for the past 2 years.
Ahhh lets live with that its not a big deal, she was out of my league anyway.
I will just cover my head with the blanket…
Ugh, whos this, its Friday. Let me sleep go away, no one is home, i will stay silent and hope whoever mr.No common sense gives up and go away.
”Deahyun, wake up! ”
Who is deahyun…
I half opened my eyes and in front of me was a beautiful lady, with crimson hair, and round honey eyes wearing a creamy turtleneck top with black jeans and a long brown jacket.
Wait who is this…
As much as this sight is refreshing especially in the morning, i can sue her for breaking into my house.
Maybe she has a key, she is probably the new building owner…
Oh crap, i am 3 months late on rent.
”I know i am late on rent but it is not an excuse to break into someones house… Or room i can sue you for this! ” I said
She gazed at me with confusion and disappointment, i felt like i did a crime…
”I expected too much from you to just act responsibly once, ” she said
Ohoh responsibility, is she trying to act as if she cares about me… And why her face doesn show more anger than disappointment…
Am i that pathetic !??
”Look why don you let me sleep now and come back when i am awake ”
She is irritating!! Why is she acting like this?
She unexpectedly turned around and headed to the door.
She left but the sight of her cracking into tears before leaving awakened me!!
Wait my room door is not in that direction.
I snapped onto my feet just to realize that i am not in my room, this room is very spacious.
The bed was deliciously comfortable, she is not here anymore so…
Waked up saturated hoping what happened was just some realistic dream, but to my not surprise i was in the same place spacious room, a wide window to the right of the bed and a round table just below the window.
The round table had some scratches, on top of it were some cards and a phone, random papers and other stuff, on the other wall aligned to the table was a mirror…
I recognized it was a mirror but still didn process who was the person on it, blue hair fit a masculine body, and wearing only a boxer.
After some moving my hand up and down, left and right…
That was me, i am in control of this body!!!?
The face of this body was familiar, not in the normal way, but as if i have seen it somewhere not in my perimeter, a weird feeling climbed my spine…
My disbelief was farting my brain.
a few seconds later, i accepted it…
”I AM DEAHYUN!!!!!! ”
Deahyun from my light novel, a 22 years old male with selfishness to the moon and a good-looking face, i stood up and started analyzing what happened…
”I AM THE DICKHEAD FROM MY NOVEL!!!?? ”
the only dickhead, the one whom the protagonist will ditch and let the zombie eat in his first encounter.
So that woman was dickheads girlfriend and the protagonists sister Saeroom, she is supposed to be pregnant when they break up.
”Whats today!? ”
I hurried to the table to check the date on the phone…
”Uh.. Still have time ”
I was supposed to accompany her to the hospital today, shes gonna test for a kidney operation she did 4 months ago…
”I AM EVEN MORE DICKHEAD THAN DICKHEAD ”
I took a long time to process what was happening, so in the novel, its like this:
**Today**: i go with Saeroom to the hospital and we figure out she was pregnant.
**12 Dec**: the zombie virus starts spreading in Europe and northern Africa.
**14 Dec**: Saeroom will break up with me.
**17 Dec**: zombie virus enters Korea.
**20 Dec**: contamination levels rise to the stratosphere, and the government loses control over it, same day Saeroom convinces the protagonist to bring me with them to the shelter,
**21 Dec**: me dead…
The main goal now is to stay on the cool side of the protagonist, the protagonist is a returner, so he is probably aware that i am a scum.
”WHY DICKHEAD!!!!!?? ”
Thinking won solve anything i need to go to the hospital, luckily i still have some time till the test results come out.
I wore dickhead clothes and went to find the fridge full of alcohol…
”This man is unbelievable ”
I wrote that he was only on an alcohol diet, and this transferred quite literally.
I took some cash from the round table and headed out of the house.
The world is a decent Korean replica, this place was my bosss house in my world, so not much happened to the world, except for some fashion changes.. the artist of the novel was a fashionista i shall say.
Took a taxi to the hospital where Saeroom is now, the language was Korean, and taxis were something universal so i had nothing to worry about in that department.
Arriving at the hospital, i was considering my words… what i shall say, i knew Saeroom was the honest type, considering that, and i have no women experience before, i was on the edge, my life was on the line.
At peak stress i saw him, Minho… my novels protagonist he was an average-looking man, with dark eyes, a small chin, red hair, and skinny bones, not what i call a protagonist but his powers and body form will change later.
I walked towards him, i was sweating from stress when he gazed at me… Stunned for a moment then raised my hand and shouted
”MINHO ” he recognized me but took a moment to react, his sharp stare becoming a faking smile… I was intimidated by that reaction, i knew am not gonna pass the 21st December test.
The reason why i was hoping to get into his side, is because he is the only person who awakened his powers and had his abilities developed in the first 5 years of the apocalypse, the outside world will be a blood party where humans eat each other.
The food is all contaminated and people had no choice but to eat each other, water was fine but only a cup per day. Harsh world for a pregnant woman and her brother whos not a returner, in the original story before he returned, i was the one who ate his sister so he is still having those hard feelings, i need to change them…
”Hey M-minho i am aware i am irresponsible sometimes, but from today and on i will be another person… ” I continued
”I will propose to your sister if she agrees.. ” me.
”NO! You Won ” he shouted.
His actions are not intimidating to a normal person, he is skinny short, and soft-voiced.
But for me, i know what he is going to be…
”I want to change… just give me a chance! ” Said me
I knew that the way to an honest person like him is truth, can tell him all the truth but some of it will do. I may be inexperienced with women, but man ”rationality ” is easy, i convinced my boss to raise my salary by 30% without talking to him, this bozo is a cake.
”I know i treated you and Saeroom sometimes with disrespect, but now i am a different person i bet my life on that ” i continued
”No matter what happens and when i will make Saeroom above all priorities ”
He returned to the old gaze for a moment…
”Lets go see Saeroom, ” he said
Oh nice, he didn continue the argument, there wasn one, to be honest, i just bonked him with heroic sentences, but i think that gave the effect, silence is a sign of ”i will think about it later ”, thats a good for me now.
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