VESSEL

When will I cease to exist?

Whats going on?

Why can I see?

Come to think of it, I can even feel my body.

This feeling of emptiness is indescribably weird. Its making me feel really itchy; however, I am unable to locate the source of the itch. No wonder, since I am unable to find my own body. Is this what a coma feels like?

Only by forgetting the itchy feeling does it go away. Thats what I hope at least.

It is impossible to forget THE ITCH in this land of NOTHING. Only by forgetting and ignoring can I forget. I know but I can . Why me?

WHY IS THERE NOTHING BUT THIS ITCH. WHAT DID I DO WRONG? HAVE I SINNED AND THIS IS MY PUNISHMENT???

At times, I feel like the space around me has moved, almost as if it twisted.

Welp, it seems like Im dead. Just gonna do my thing in this empty space. Although I seem to still possess the memories of my former life.

I can remember what the warm sun rays feel like.

I can remember the sound of birds.

I can remember the taste of a burger. But I can picture any humans. I know what they should look like with 2 legs, 2 arms, a @#%$#, and a head. Why can I picture anything to that description? My gut feeling tells me that I used to be a human, but Im just not that certain anymore. Should I trust my gut, if I don have a gut? Whose gut is this? Was I ever even ”alive ”? Are these memories mine?

Come to think of it, I am unable to picture cats. Whats going on… I HATE CATS. IT HURTS SO BAD.

Not just cats but mammals.

Wow… I have an unbelievably huge amount of information in my brain, but its all useless if I can apply it. Why can I just forget it? This useless info creates an empty void that messes with my mind. Knowing less would help me rest. My soul can handle this; its being torn apart, piece by piece. Why is this continuing? In how many pieces can a soul be split? The soul becomes exponentially smaller with each split. Even the great evil wizard could only achieve 7 and he had to sacrifice his nose and hair. Am I an even greater evil wizard lord?

Is this a rare form of amnesia? Did I just forget my 6 senses?

Time has lost all meaning. The itch has evolved into a feeling of being devoured. Am I trapped and being consumed? What kind of trap would be able to cause such a thing? A trap card? An illusion formation? One created by God himself? Now thats just unbelievable. More like Satan created this just to torture me. I wish I could just eat him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate …? Who do I hate? Why do I hate him? I hate myself?

Im still uncertain if I just can see or if everything is just one bland color that just appears to be nothing as my senses have already adjusted to it. However, everything is becoming fuzzy, almost disconnected and shattered. How can nothing feel shattered and incomplete? Is something changing? I can smell dangerous tables growing in the distance.

I seem to have started hearing things a while back. I decided to name him Jelly.

Jelly seems to be growing louder. Hes starting to beat away at my soul. I would have long ripped off my ears if I had any.

Jelly you
e the best. What a brilliant idea to stop THE ITCH with pain. This blindingly bright pain. It feels so relaxing and soothing. My soul feels fulfilled.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

MINE ARE ALL DEAD BECAUSE THEY WOULDNT LISTEN TO MY ORDERS.

WE ARE ONE,

WE ARE STRONG,

WE ARE UNITED,

TOGETHER WE LIVE,

TOGETHER WE DIE,

but I don want to die

Do I want to die?

huh..

Can I even die?

Would I just end up back here if I did?

Death would be too easy an answer. I wish I could meet Death. He seems pretty chill but smells really bad. How I do I do the do without the do?

Everything is moving so fast, Im being hit from every direction. I can SEE the @#[email protected]%. Its coming to save me. I AM ALIVE. I AM FREE.

Im not crazy. I promise Jelly, I would never hurt you no matter what happens. But will I in the future? I don know. Ill kill them all. How could they. That was mine. But they took it. I will avenge you Jelly. I won let a single one go. Why should I care?

Why is this happening?

Why can I just die?

What is pain?

Why me?

Who am I?

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